The ZOOM Effect

There was an article in today's The Advertiser, "Parents Unable to let go of Work". I read it and it got me thinking about what I call 'The ZOOM Effect' and how it subsequently affects families.

I call it 'The ZOOM Effect' due to the need to be busy, and the need to rush EVERYTHING.
I am the first to admit I am guilty of it.

In our household, we go out on a Sunday afternoon for a drive to our favourite bakery every now and then, and for some reason I find myself rushing.
Rushing to get there. Rushing to eat. Rushing to get home.

And I have NO reason for it whatsoever. For some reason I am just not made to be able to take my time and relax. I don't know how to be present in each and every moment and I am always waiting for something to be over so I can move on to something else.

That my friends, is 'The ZOOM Effect'.

I blame this on my generation, the introduction of Social Media, the Internet and all the recent additions to society that now run instantly. Because with all of that, it has created a demand for NOW.

There's no sending letters anymore. There's no such thing as waiting until the shops open - there are restaurants open 24-hours. And there are also supermarkets that deliver. That doesn't even include online shopping via eBay, etc.

All of this has created a much more demanding public (me). And as a result people are working harder and longer to meet demands, even if it means taking work home, or working overtime. Or both.

I don't know how to overcome it, especially when mortgage rates are high and the cost of living is even higher, so the need to work more is strong. And people are waiting longer to have children, after their careers are established... careers that are demanding, that continue to demand post-children.

It's a vicious cycle, and it's SO hard to find that happy medium. It really is.

All I know is that as a parent, I do the BEST that I can with the time that I have.

But I will try and stop rushing.
I will slow down and be more present in the moments that I share with my children.
I will play on the playground, instead of sitting under the tree and watching Logan play alone.
I will join in on more creative time, more play time and more fun time.

I will work smarter, not harder.

__________________________________

How do you cope in your working life?
How do you juggle and balance your life as a parent, against your life as an employee/business owner?

xx

Mother's Day Classic

The Adelaide Mummy Meetings Team!
Mother's Day Classic 2012, Elder Park

Yesterday was Mother's Day, and I took part in the Mother's Day Classic along with my mother, sister and hubby along with some friends/mums AND kids!

We walked 7.5km's. With kids in prams and a certain 6-year old on a scooter (when he wasn't piggy backed on Cameron's shoulders).

It was a good morning, as good as it can be when it starts at 5:30am to walk 7.5kms! And with approximately 9,000 other people present it was also quite BUSY!

It may have been cold , but once we got moving we warmed up fairly quickly.

My Mummy and I

We managed to do the walk before the rain set in (it started not long after we finished) and the whole 7.5kms were walked within 90-minutes. The event was organised really well. It was well signed, and volunteers were spread out throughout the event with drinks and words of encouragement. (And they were shivering!)

Our team was decked out in AMM t-shirts and merchandise thanks to Lululemon Athletica Adelaide.

The Adelaide Mummy Meetings Team raised $120 for Breast Cancer Research.
Can't go wrong with that!

That 4 Letter Word...

When it comes to 'Relationship Lotto' I have hit the jackpot.

It's not perfect, but I don't want it to be. I am one of those people that think a relationship is all about those imperfections. And the little things.

But this relationship almost didn't happen. And whilst I sit here and am so glad that it did, it really brings home how much such a small and seemingly insignificant decision can really change your life.

You see, I met my now husband online. We met on RSVP.
I was only out of my previous relationship for about 6-months and I had very high standards as a result.

Previous to meeting Cameron, I joked to my girlfriends that I wanted to end up with a 'blonde haired, blue eyed rugby player' it was a joke at the time, but to be perfectly honest it was what I wanted. I had chased the idea of what was 'right' for so long, and they failed. I wanted to raise the bar and set my sights on someone that I thought was unattainable.

I wanted to follow my heart instead of my head, for once.

Cameron and I made contact a good couple of months before we met. I was cautious having a 2.5 year-old Logan to protect, but also because I was still trying to work out what I wanted. He 'seemed' nice, but didn't ooze a lot of personality in our chat sessions.

And those that know me, know I need someone with personality.

He invited me out on a couple of dates prior to me saying yes... and trust me, I regret it now! And when it came to finally agreeing to meet, I wasn't excited. To the point where I almost bailed, in favour of a night home alone.

This was my life changing decision. I went.

When I laid eyes on him for the first time, I went weak at the knees. For those that don't know, Cameron has blonde hair, blue eyes and plays rugby. I was on the phone to a girlfriend at the time I saw him (so I had a Plan B if he was nothing like his picture) and he walked in the complete opposite direction when he saw me.

My.Heart.Sank.

But me being me followed him.

He went to the ATM only a few metres away and I popped up behind him "Hi stranger!".

The rest of the date went well, we were both nervous and after the movie he escorted me to my car and gave me a goodbye kiss. It wasn't perfect, but hey who cares!!

And when he left I sat in my car and had a giggle to myself. I giggled at the fact I had been missing out 'on that' for a couple of months, the fact that he was EXACTLY what I had been looking for and although the personality was a bit quiet to what I would like, I was willing to give date 2 a go.

And then the 'He's not going to call doubts'... until he SMS'ed me about 15mins later. And we saw each other the following night.

And every night until we moved in together a couple of months later.

His personality isn't anything like what it was when we first met. I learnt early on that he is petrified of girls (you know Stan from South Park? Like that!), so when I followed him on our first date, it was because he FREAKED out and didn't know what to say/do. Because I took charge and took the pressure off of him, it was easy street. Our personalities are actually a very good combination.

And because of that one small decision on that day, I now have him as my husband. I now have Ryder and a complete little family, and we have this great life that I wouldn't have had if I stayed at home.

I don't know where I would be right now if I chose the alternative, but I don't care. I care that the life I have now is exactly where I want it to be, with the only one I want it to be with.

I took a chance. For once I went against my head and followed my heart.

And I love where it took me.

The Eve of Mother's Day

Mother's Day last year saw me crack a wobbly. And our first marital fight.

I look back on it and laugh... but at the time I was seething.

You see, my husband is a 'yes' man. He's generous, he's loyal and most of all he is SUCH a lover and giver, that he puts himself last to anyone and everyone around him. This can be seen as both a strength and weakness in the personality stakes.

On this day, the above was a weakness. And as a result of his inability to say no, I lost my shit.

We spent the morning of Mother's Day 2011 at his mother's house. My mother in law is a kind soul with her heart in the right place, most of the time, but she also has a knack for having Cameron help her around the house. That's fine, that's what sons are for (well I hope so because I am bringing up 2 of them!)... but she leaves it until we are all packed up and saying our goodbyes.

We had a late breakfast and as we were considering leaving, Cameron was asked to hang up some pictures. Of course, he said yes and I planted my pregnant bum on the couch in front of the football, thinking it would be a 5-min job.

It wasn't.

An hour later, with steam coming from my ears, I got up off the couch and as politely as I could given the mood, I asked if he were done yet as Mother's Day is almost over. I still had to go and visit my own mother AND also try and get some time with Logan considering it was also my Mother's Day too.

The short story was that I was still waiting... my mum didn't get a visit nor did I get any real time with my little family. Hubby got the silent treatment the whole drive home and the 'megs explosion' took place as soon as we got home.

I was angry. Livid. And Mother's Day 2011 was crappy.

Could it not have waited until we were there another time?! It's not like we don't go to her house!

I am sentimental and Mother's Day can't be crappy.

This year I am sure it will be different.
I am now a mother to 2 little boys and hubby has learnt to say 'no'.

Not only that, but I planned what I wanted to do with my little family for first thing in the morning. We'll swing past my mother in laws on the way home, so if we stay there a bit longer than planned, then that's OK. (Up here for thinking, right?!)

Have a GREAT Mother's Day tomorrow guys! I know I will!

xx